Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

Indiana Jones movies operate in their own universe, where seemingly anything can happen, and usually does. Despite that, at first I thought I could describe this movie in one word: excessive. However, I soon realized my error. The newest Indy installment is FANTASTICALLY excessive. Often times I found myself wondering how many more bad situations old man Jones could get himself into. Sometimes I questioned where (if anywhere) the movie was going. But throughout the entire thing, I felt the sense of wonder and excitement that the Indiana Jones series so well instills in viewers.

That being said, this movie was nothing like I had expected. For once, I decided to not read up on this one. Not even a review. Due to this, a couple of times throughout the movie I found myself slightly lost in the plot. Not a good thing, considering most movie-goers probably don't extensively research their choices. Plot ambiguity aside, I loved this movie. The actors were great (Shia LaBeouf wasn't even annoying!), there were familiar characters, and no action scenes were spared with this one. In fact, so much happened to Indy and his party that at times it felt like they had crammed three Indiana Jones movies into one, something that originally put me off just a little bit. As the movie progressed, though, I came to realize that excessive action is what makes an Indiana Jones movie so good, and it's what people want from these movies. People want to believe that a normal person like a teacher can set off on an amazing adventure. It takes me back to a time when I felt that the Earth wasn't completely explored, and maybe there still is something mysterious waiting to be found, even if it was only true in my imagination. That's what I liked most about this movie.

7/7

Gatorade Tiger

Red Drive: Taking the trophy for red thing with least taste, this flavor is my least favorite. Should be called 'Red Nothing.' If I wanted some watered-down juice, I'd grab my beloved Vitamin Water. 

Cool Fusion: Has a good taste to it, much stronger than Red Drive. This one's actually kinda refreshing, and because it's sour, it's also decent at the great sport of thirst-quenching. Leaves a sort of sour aftertaste though, not too pleasant. 

Quiet Storm: This thing is so amazingly grapey it's creating a storm in my pants. Hands down the best flavor. Not too strong, but easily strong enough, you'll be sad when the last drop is gone.

McDonald's Southwest Chicken Sandwich

BAD McDonald's. Trying to fool me. I'm a big chicken fan, so I got kinda excited when I heard about a "Southwest Chicken Sandwich." But upon eating said sandwich, I was quite disappointed. It was a strange sort of disappointment though, because the sandwich is actually good; it might even be better than the plain ol' McChicken. The reason for this is that there is a marked difference in the..."chicken"... used in each product. They kinda incriminated themselves by having two different types of chicken in two of their sandwiches. Unless "McChicken" is a specific breed of chicken...

Anyway, like I said, the Southwest Chicken Sandwich is a good sandwich. The problem is, it's just plain chicken. There's nothing Southwest about it, including the fact that it was served to me in the Southeast. That being said, it does satisfy the requirements for being a chicken sandwich: chicken and bread. And it's actually a pretty filling item. The meat is tender and seemingly real, so that's usually a plus. Not a big fan of the pickles that come on it. Not a big fan of pickles on anything, but especially not this sandwich, due to conflicting tastes. Basically, if you like chicken sandwiches, this is for you. If you want anything more than that, go elsewhere.

4/7

Superbad

If you're as sick of hearing "I am McLovin" as I am, raise your hand.  Superbad is about a couple dorky teens who will do anything for sex before college. That's basically it. That's why it's so surprising when you actually see it; this movie sets itself apart from 98% of the rest of this ridiculous genre. It's stupid, loud, and obnoxious but it's also smart, hip, and absurd enough to keep it engaging. 

A semi-auto-biographical story penned by Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg, this movie is obviously a comedy. In most aspects, it succeeds. It's got the penis jokes; it's got crrrraaazy situations; it's got hilarious awkwardness. It pushes past comedy at moments, though. Apatow and crew are notoriously good at pulling back the facade of reality and exposing human nature. To have done that successfully in this genre of movie is an accomplishment.

5/7

Sierra Mist Undercover Orange

Orange soda is a staple in the soda industry, but for some people, it's just not enough. In an age where multi-tasking is now automated as breathing, people may turn to multi-flavoral items to retain that element of delicious, chaotic chaos. So it should be no surprise that orange would become that third wheel for the couple that is lemon-lime.

Is it really necessary, though, to improve on the legendary lemon-lime partnership? And what's wrong with the many varieties of orange soda out there? Although to  the experimental drinkers mixing of the two seems like a natural idea, Sierra Mist's "Undercover Orange" promotional soda for the movie "Get Smart" fails to seal the deal. It's almost as if the lemon-lime and orange flavors have a water-and-oil relationship; the flavors seem to repel against each other, while simultaneously taking advantage of my taste buds. And my taste buds don't want it. The carbonation level of this drink is through the roof. As soon as it hits your tongue, the liquid disappears and is replaced by little, fizzy bubbles that do nothing to quench thirst. Sierra Mist should get smart and take this stuff off the shelves before anyone notices it exists.

1/7

RAZR

My friend Ben got a RAZR when they were first released. Upon toying with it in the Cingular store, my distaste for this product developed and bloomed. A few years having past, my little plant has grown into a fiery-red bouquet of ... well, I'll spare the dramatics. Simply put: I can't stand this phone. Perhaps it's due to the fact that 96.5% of Homo-Sapiens own one; it might be the offensive colors it comes in; maybe it's the way it reminds me of a "futuristic" 1950s movie prop. Most likely, however, it's the fact that this phone is just awful.

Given that the phone has a few decent characteristics (it's thin...that's all that comes to mind actually), most of the important parts on this phone are quite sub-par. There's a mini-screen on the front of it when it's closed. A nice concept, but I've honestly known people who have had theirs installed upside-down. Well, that could be a factory mistake. Next, there's the hardware. The operating system in every RAZR I've ever used is unexplainably laggy. The keypad is completely flat and one piece, ensuring maximum error probability. There's an unnecessarily large block at the bottom of the phone. The charger outlet is open, knobby, and uncomfortable. But that's all just my opinion. If I had to own a RAZR, though, I'd be much more inclined to use it for something other than making calls.

1/7

Natasha Bedingfield - Pocketful of Sunshine

Natasha Bedingfield had a string of hits from her debut CD, Unwritten, in 2004. These earlier singles had an optimistically youthful, care-free feeling and addictive hooks that made her endearing, a guilty pleasure. On her second effort, she trades in the carpe diem attitude for that man-crave that we all get from time to time.

    Most of the lyrics deal with one subject: Men. While this muse has produced gold in the past, after 10 songs it starts to sound desperate. The hooks are still there this time around, but they're not as sharp. Composed of 1/3 club anthems, 1/3 ballads, and 1/3 pop songs, "Pocketful of Sunshine" just doesn't have standout tracks like "Unwritten" did. Bedingfield is a great singer - a fact that she might acknowledge too much. As far as show-offy riffs go, she's approaching Christina Aguilera. However, I'm not saying this is a bad album. Maybe a little over the top, but in general it's very accessible, and will appeal to a broad audience. 

3/7

+44 - When Your Heart Stops Beating

Whether you hated or loved them, when Blink-182 went on hiatus (musician speak for "We hate each other now") it was a big deal. Out of the ashes came two hopeful but polarized new bands: +44 and Angels and Airwaves. While Angels and Airwaves rushed to get an album out (and subsequently proclaimed it was the best album made in the last 20 years), +44 took their time, imbuing experience and emotion into their music. 

Listening to When Your Heart Stops Beating, I was struck by the quality of the songs. Every song seemed extensively worked out. Rather than making a few singles with sub-par songs to back them up, +44 crafted a whole album of singles. Originally touted to be an electronica outfit, the band quickly diffused into a four-piece rock band. For many this was disappointing. However, going at the music with an alternative mindset enabled this band to create some very eclectic, inspired rock music. This is an album that is easy to listen straight through, and will be ringing in your head for weeks.

7/7

Pizza Mia

Pizza Hut has this new "personal" pizza (which is curiously impersonal) called "Pizza Mia". The box states that the pizza is made with "Rich Whole Milk Mozzarella Cheese" and "Old World Pizza Sauce"! I bit into a piece of pepperoni pizza mia, and I tasted the "dough from fine white Great Plains flour"! Alright, I'm kidding. Gotcha!

The Pizza Mia actually turned out to be quite a great option for Pizza Hut to offer; it's cheap as hell (3 for $5), high quality, and filling. The ingredients honestly tasted more fresh than other Pizza Hut pizzas. On top of that, the Pizza Mia seems to have decreased the amount of grease (especially in the crust) in the pizza by about 98%, which is quite stomachable. My only complaint is that the layer of cheese was thin consistently, however I'm pretty sure you can get extra cheese, so count mia in! Woo!

5/7

Nintendo DS

Everyone was so skeptical when news of the Nintendo Dual-Screen thing hit the web. It went on to outsell any system since it was released, and the astounding amount of games released on a weekly basis outnumbers any other system. In Japan, the DS is utilized for so much more than in the U.S., for practical uses like accounting and education. Hell, in Japan they even allow students to design and release official Nintendo DS games.

No matter where you live, I feel that the DS has something to offer you, whether it be Atlus's quirky games, Squeenix's Final Fantasy releases, puzzle-based Professor Layton games, Lawyer-sim Phoenix Wright games (recently trumped for the more patriotic Apollo Justice as main character), the rhythm-based Elite Beat Agents, or the stuck-on-an-island themed Lost in Blue series, the variety is unrivaled. The touch screen is sensitive to the point that it ran away crying while I was playing Ninja Gaiden: Dragon Sword. I've heard complaints about the way it feels in one's hands, perhaps inducing cramps, however, I've never noticed any problems in that area. Probably just an individual-oriented issue. The point is, the DS is magnificently portable, playable, sleek, and innovative, rendering it a 7 out of 7 in my book.

7/7

Super Mario Galaxy

A certain stocky plumber has permeated American society like no other could even dream of. The Mickey Mouse of Japan made his way states-wide in 1985 and has never looked back. Last year he visited about the only place he hasn't been; space. The storyline of the game doesn't differ too much from the classic...Bowser steals the princess as usual, but this time he takes the whole castle. Into space.

Super Mario Galaxy is the best Mario game to date. Don't believe me? Play it. With new additions to the franchise like Star Bits, Launch and Sling stars, and spin techniques, as well as stunning environments, mind-blowing physics, and over 40 original galaxies, it's illegal in 38 states to not play it. You can literally long jump off the edge of a small planet and orbit it completely because of the unique gravitational physics. SMG contains an unprecedented number of bosses for Mario games. One flaw: the game contains an optional little story that is bearable at best. However, this part of the game is totally optional. Prior to this game, I was in love with Super Mario Sunshine. I always will be, but this game surpasses the predecessors in gameplay, music (absolutely outstanding orchestral work), graphics, boss battles, and most importantly, fun.

7/7

Juno

If you don't already know what "Juno" is about, you might be a redneck. That's what Foxworthy would tell ya, at least. It's about a teen-aged girl with teen-aged dialogue who gets pregnant from a teen-aged boy. She tries to give the unborn child up for adoption and all sorts of crazy teen-aged adventures ensue.

Sarcasm aside, the movie was good. The characters were realistic, for the most part. Juno is the only character that comes off slightly contrived, as her personality starts out very valley-girl hip and changes rather quickly. Juno's parents are very entertaining; her relationship with them is much of the wind in "Juno"'s sail. It's interesting to see Juno's knowledge of romance and relationships grows and develops. All in all, director Jason Reitman manages to tell a witty, youthful, and heart-warming story without ever seeming cheesy or sappy.

5/7

Iron Man

I didn't know a damn thing about Iron Man before I saw the movie; in fact, if you had asked me who he was, I probably would've made a confused face and said "Man 'O Steel Man?" However, Robert Downey Jr. has cemented in my mind the fact that Iron Man is indeed a superhero (at least on par with Man 'O Steel Man), he is everything a superhero should be. Tony Stark is a playboy, an entrepreneur, an inventor, a genius, and charming in a way that everyone wants to be. All that and he gets to be a superhero too? Not fair.

Thankfully, this movie makes the superhero genre feel fresh after being super saturated with garbage for a few years now. What makes this movie unique compared to other superhero movies is probably the fact that his secret identity is way more badass than his metal suit. While the action scenes are intense and impressive, Tony Stark is what carries the movie, not Iron Man. In true superhero-story fashion, the bad guy (portrayed by Jeff Bridges -- hard as I try, I can't shake the image of The Dude climbing in a giant metal suit..."Far out, man!") gets a hold of what the superhero has been working on and develops it for his own use. Lots of action ensues, and one of them comes out the victor, try and guess who. All in all, this movie is a great watch, funnier than expected, and Tony Stark is a complex character that is definitely sequel-worthy.

6/7

iPhone

Before you read this you should probably know that I'm an Apple fanboy of sorts. That being said, I can assure you my Apple-ness has nothing to do with why I think the iPhone is near perfect. The whole screen is a touchpad! I was worried about that at first, probably like many people. After using the iPhone extensively, however, it becomes clear that not only is there nothing to worry about, but the touch-screen of the iPhone far exceeds expectations. In fact, there's a video floating around the web of a group of people that put the iPhone in a bag of keys and rocks and went to town with it. When it came out, there was only one tiny, hardly noticeable scratch.

The interface on the iPhone is outstanding and beautiful. It oozes with Apple's sleek goodness, responds quickly and accurately, but is not very customizable. Unless you unlock it, of course, which is the subject of lawsuits and controversy, which I won't go into. People complain about lack of tactile feedback with the keypad. That's another thing I was worried about, but again, it's simple to use, and the learning curve is quite short. Internet browsing is glorious, especially around Wi-Fi hotspots. Picture viewing is unique because of the pinch-to-zoom technology that the multi-touch screen enables. This phone is not without disadvantages, though. First, it's on AT&T, so the coverage is limited. Second, for reasons unknown, the iPhone can't take videos, or send multi-media messages. Surely this problem will be fixed in upcoming iterations of the device. 

6/7

Golden Compass

By this time I'm sure most people view the Golden Compass as a children's book, because the marketing for the film was geared that way. Despite entailing the story of a little girl, the first book in Philip Pullman's trilogy masterpiece is brilliantly-conceived; it's a deeply-themed journey that is actually adult-oriented.

Pullman creates his universe (multiple, actually) with such detail and ease that by the end of the book you're more acquainted with his universe than our own. Religion, or anti-religion, is an important theme in the Golden Compass. However, Pullman isn't trying to convert the believers, as all the Christian boycotters would have you believe; it's more a subtle detail than an explicit fact that in Pullman's book, religion is controlling and bad. Subsequently, most children and teens would probably not even make the connection between religion and the Golden Compass. This work of fantasy sci-fi is as ambitious as it is enthralling and intelligent, and will be remembered for a long time.

6/7

LG Chocolate

LG's Chocolate was groundbreaking a long, long time ago. Maybe six months ago. Doesn't seem too long, does it? It sort of demonstrates how quickly the industry's technology advances. I heard that they're making phones that have built in projectors that can display video on any surface; did you hear that? Anyway, at this point in time the LG Chocolate is completely obsolete, though I'm of the opinion that it always sucked.

The Chocolate's flagship feature was clearly the touch-sensitive buttons, which ended up being its downfall for me. At any sensitivity setting, they're glitchy and unreliable. The buttons on the keypad are slightly too small for most male hands, but just enough so that it becomes aggravating. The "End" button is located on the side of the phone, which is the cause of too many accidents. Also, everybody has the damn thing! The only hope this phone had was its unique user interfaces, which were rays of hope in the default Verizon-themed sea of poop. But hey, anything's better than a RAZR!

2/7

Bose Companion 3

Despite what Josh may tell you, Bose speakers are great. Overpriced? Definitely. Regardless, they're better than 90% of the competition. I'm not much of a speaker buff, but I'm realizing more and more how good things can actually sound. The Companion 3 speakers are comprised of two mini speakers, and a mini sub-woofer, hence the 3. I'm assuming that the Companion 5 has 4 mini speakers, which (judging by the Companion 3) would be mind-blowing.

With the two mini speakers at the back of a room facing outwards, the room instantly fills with sound. Even at a very low volume, the sound level is the same across the room as in front of the speakers, which defies logic. The crispness that these speakers produce, even at high volumes, is astounding. The bass is almost overwhelmingly powerful sometimes, but most devices have EQ options, so it shouldn't be a problem. The speakers themselves are very small and stylish, and can be taken off the stands completely to look like a small cube, which is kinda cool. For $250, blowing your cash has never sounded better.

7/7